I was able to have the show recorded and edited by Tuesday, which I don't think has ever happened on a non-vacation week. Please clap. And enjoy new music from Mascots, along with other things that tumbled from my brain! Let's do this!
New music from Mascots (3:25), stopping retail theft (9:41), cloning your voice (22:46), missing when social media was fun (34:53), and Jerry Seinfeld (42:36).
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Mascots
Thanks to our old friends for the tune! Find more from them here and tell em Pat sent you! Also, listen our chat from 2019 here!
"I'd stop that thief."
I know lots of people are keyboard warriors and everyone wants to be the hero, but be serious here. These guys would not step in if they saw theft in action. They would do what most everyone does: watch while saying "wow that sucks" before going about their day. The fantasy that you would save the day and be lauded as a great guy is just that.
Cloning your voice
I'll admit that being able to type words and have them read back to me in my own voice (or a version of it) seems pretty cool. But I did look up some information - also I already had an account - likely to see if I could record interviews there: You have to subscribe to the Pro plan, which is $29.99/month. The Privacy Policy did not mention specifically who would have access to Digital Voices, as they're called, but I also was not able to contact support in any way. The only contact form available is for sales, and that form does not accept Gmail addresses. So as interesting as this seems? I'm not sending my voice to them.
Social media used to be fun
Remember when you could share dumb thoughts with your friends and random weirdos looking for clout couldn't bombard you with "hot takes" and whatnot? Or when Shaq would post something like "here's my new car" and 56,000 people could just admire that? Now we're stuck with a bunch of dumb posts designed to get people sharing and yelling about them, so some other dork gets the clicks. I'm telling you: we all need to join SpaceHey.
Jerry Seinfeld
Did I react to a snippet of an interview and just roll along without full context? Given Jerry's history, I don't think I was out of line. The idea that you can't make a sitcom anymore because "woke" people will be offended is ridiculous. You can't make a sitcom because your jokes are outdated. Or, more accurately, the studio would give you seven episodes before canning your show to get a tax break. These "you can't joke about anything anymore" guys are so lame. But also? This is Jerry Seinfeld, who hasn't played a college in a decade because the students stopped laughing at his jokes. Why is anyone surprised?
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And that, as we say, is that! Wow, I really packed a lot into these notes. I guess I'm in writing mode since I'm doing the newsletter (a day late, I know) today too. Anyhows! Next week we should have another sweet tune and then I don't know what else. Come on back and until then, don't do anything I wouldn't do!
Crap open a cold one!
(This post was brought to you by Broad Street Bound.)
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